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need advice on how deal with my difficult sister-in-law

Last updated: 15th May 2023
Question ID: #8631
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Salam Walaikum. i will try to make this as short as possible. so my brother was forced to get married to my sister-in-law and so he’s always been against this marriage and said i will get remarried but will not make her my wife. in my culture divorce is not an option so both men and women has to try and live with each other. i’m not going to take anyone’s side here and speak from what i’ve seen. both are stubborn and will not listen to each other but my sister-in-law has always been unfair. long story short they got together and she got pregnant but had an argument over a silly thing and she started screaming and swearing so my brother got upset and left but now he’s back home but he’s not speaking to my sister-in-law. both were in the wrong and both have a very high ego so no one’s apologising. they have a 8 months old daughter as well. anyway so now my second brother got engaged and my first sister-in-law once had an argument with my his fiancé. so the other day something happened and my second brother got mad at his fiancé and was telling my mother how he wish he didn’t get engaged to her. so my first sister-in-law heard this and told this story to her sister and her sister told the fiancé. she called me and was upset saying why did my brother said this in front of everyone so when i asked my sister in law about it she got mad and started screaming. at first she said she didn’t say it and later she said even if i did say it his fiancé has no right to get upset. she should look at me i’ve been through a lot and no matter what i do because i’m upset people should not question me because i’m not mentally stable now. when she’s mad she threatens she would leave this house and live alone and bring shame to your family and always talks about divorce. we really don’t care if she wants divorce she can ask her husband and get it but she never speak to her husband and whenever something happens she takes it out on us and get angry at us like we didn’t tell our brother to leave you? why are you mad at us? why are you telling others what’s happening in our family? she hits her 8 months old daughter in front of us and screams and wish death upon my brother in front of my mum.

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

الجواب حامداومصليا

When there is conflict between families you need to get a third person from either side of the family to listen to the problem and to provide a fair solution.

Additionally, your local Imam can help in giving guidance and counsel.

And Allah knows best

28 Shawwal 1444/ 19 May 2023

Answer last updated on:
22nd May 2023
Answered by:
Ulamaa ID 04
Location: London