I am in dire need of advice, I am trying to keep my question brief but I ask of you please do advise me as much as possible as the problem which I go on to discuss has really been affecting me considerably, to the point where it is even affecting my 'ibadah.
I have been getting terrible thoughts in my mind. Thoughts which I have no control over and they are causing me such grief and upset and I fear Allah is very displeased with me. The more good I try to do in my deen, the more severe the thougts become.. I researched about this and saw many answers that these may be waswas from shaytaan but I also know that I have quite an obsessive compulsive mind so my mind will think of a topic so hard without my will! My teacher was speaking of shirk and the punishment and a lesson and it scared me so much I could not control my mind from stop thinking about it and now it is like shaytaan is forcing me to think bad shirk thougts and they are hurting and upsetting me ever so much & I fear Allah may take it that I am actually commiting shirk! La hawla wala quwatta illah billah. If the thoughts are because of my own obsessive mind, will Allah take these thoughts as they are from myself as though I have willing thought tor committed these dreadful things? I am so scared that Allah has that it has seriosuly affected my imaan and I am so anxious about this that it is making the thoughts come even more..
When I am in salah horrible shirk thoughts come to my mind which I cannot control and it is so upsetting. I believe in Allah & my deen 100% and so I am so angered over these thoughts and scared. Will Allah accept that, whether these thoughts are from shaytaan or because I have an obsessive compulsive mind, that I do not mean them and cannot control them so much? Have I commited something awful? Please help me brothers, please.
Wassalaamu alaykum wa rahmatullah
Fear of Shirk is Imaan (faith). Fear of the punishment of the hereafter is Imaan. When you display such concerns and fears then you are displaying untainted fear of the hereafter which makes one a Mu'min.
To such people, there is no doubt that Shaytaan makes efforts. From another answer of Maulana Qamruz Zaman, "When one has evil thoughts, recite ‘Laa hawla walaa Quwwata Illaa Billaah’ abundantly, and ignore such thoughts. Do not pay attention to such thoughts and do not bother. Such evil thoughts being the whispers of Shaytaan should be treated with contempt and ignored. One should avoid seeing or doing anything that invite such thoughts. If one gives a little attention to such thoughts, the Shaytaan feels honoured. It has achieved its purpose of diverting and consuming one’s mind in evil and wrong. One should never give into that. Simply treat such thoughts with contempt and ignore them."
Involuntary thoughts are not sinful. I advise you to continue as normal and not pay any attention to it by reading the above.