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#1 [Permalink] Posted on 15th August 2011 20:35

1.The red house is on one side and the blue is on the other, where is the white house?

2.You throw away the outside and cook the inside. You eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you eat?

3.What question can never be answered yes?

4.What are four things that have an 'eye' but cannot see?

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#2 [Permalink] Posted on 15th August 2011 21:13

As this is a joke, I will give the following

1. Washington

2. Hmm. Fruit.

3. Are you stupid?

4. London eye, Birmingham eye, bournemouth eye, I.

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#3 [Permalink] Posted on 16th August 2011 00:35

3. How do you pronounce "N. O." ?

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#4 [Permalink] Posted on 16th August 2011 01:02

ENO :p

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#5 [Permalink] Posted on 16th August 2011 01:19

I think for number 2 its
are you sleeping??
You can never say the answer yes to
are you sleeping

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#6 [Permalink] Posted on 16th August 2011 04:05

Sweetmuslimahk1,

Every weekend my kids barge into my bedroom and start playing around and make a lot of noise, when I ask.them.to go away, they ask me, "are you sleeping?", to which I reply YES.

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#7 [Permalink] Posted on 16th August 2011 17:27

no imeant when you're fast asleep and someone asks you are u sleeping you cant say yes otherwse that means ur lying

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#8 [Permalink] Posted on 16th August 2011 17:49

When really sleepy, I've always answered "Yes" to "are you sleeping" too

But if i was asked, "are you asleep?" then i guess saying yes would be a lie unless it was said in the sleep.

It's like trying to look in the mirror to see how you look with your eyes closed

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#9 [Permalink] Posted on 16th August 2011 18:51

My son is fond of cokes and it tempts him all the more when he sees me having. So what I do is i dilute the coke in water and then give him. He enjoys it (yikes what a taste). Then he asks me mama is this coke I tell him yes.. Then he asks ok gimme some but with water in it ... And the anytime I dont give him he looks up to the sky and says O Allah giv my mama hidayat :S

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#10 [Permalink] Posted on 13th September 2014 09:09

Employee Rules and Regulations

Dress Code

It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary.
If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise.
If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better,so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore do not need a raise.
If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore do not need a raise.

Sick Days

We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness.
If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.

Personal Days

Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday and Sunday.

Toilet Use

Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls.
At the end of the three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open and a picture will be taken.
After your second offence, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the "Chronic Offenders category".
Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company's mental health policy!
You are allowed to use the rest room only thrice a day and you have to swipe in and out from the toilet doors also.

Lunch Break

Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy.
Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
Fat people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a slim fast.

Mails

Don't read junk and forwarded mails.

******************************

Thank you for your loyalty to our company.

We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore,

All questions, comments,concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.

The Management.

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