The Governor Amr bin Laith received a royal guest. The dinner was laid and Azharul Himaar (what a name) was instructed to remain silent whilst the guest was entertained. He did as he was told for a long period of time, but eventually lost his patient and spoke out "I have made a minaret in the village which is a thousand spans high". As he spoke a guard began to make gestures with his eyes signalling him to shut up. "What is the width of the minaret?" the guest asked.
He replied "One span".
"The width is too little for this height" The doubtful guest replied.
Azharul Himaar answered, "I had made intentions of increasing it, but this guard of yours stopped me"
Another messenger from the king arrived and yet again he was told to remain silent. He did as he was told, however, when the guest sneezed, he decided to speak out, and instead of saying "Yarhamukallah" (Allah have mercy on you) he said "Sabbahakallah" (Allah light up your face). The angry governer bitterly questioned, "Did'nt I tell you to remain quiet?"
He replied "I only spoke so that this messenger does not return back to Baghdad and inform them that these people do not know Arabic".
Abu Muhammad's son was going for Hajj, he expressed his emotions to him by saying "Son, you know that I can't live without you. Try to come back as soon as possible and make sure you do the Qurbani (Slaughter) with us. You know your mother does not eat anything until you return from the Eid prayer."
Once His (from above) slave presented a chicken to him. He remarked, "Look how much it resembles his mother". So he asked it's mother, Is this chicken a male or a female?"
Mohammed bin Ahmed relates, I went to offer my condolence to Zujaj on the death of his mother. Many great people were also present, when all of a sudden Ibn al Jasas entered laughing and shouted, "I am very happy". Everybody was shocked and asked him, "What makes you so happy when we are all saddened by this death?" He replied, "I was informed that Zujaj had died. Afterwards I was informed that it was his mother who had died and not him. I am happy on the account Zujaj is alive". On hearing this everybody was amused and started laughing.
Mohammed bin Ahmed relates, I went to offer my condolence to Zujaj on the death of his mother. Many great people were also present, when all of a sudden Ibn al Jasas entered laughing and shouted, "I am very happy". Everybody was shocked and asked him, "What makes you so happy when we are all saddened by this death?" He replied, "I was informed that Zujaj had died. Afterwards I was informed that it was his mother who had died and not him. I am happy on the account Zujaj is alive". On hearing this everybody was amused and started laughing.
A man whilst strolling in his Garden, felt a bitter taste in his mouth. He asked the gardener for Oinions with vinegar to get rid of the bad taste. The gardener did not have onions and vinegar so he said to him, "Why did you not grow the onions with the vinegar.
When the horse of the Vaseer Muhammad Bin Jaffar would not listen, he would stop feeding it as a form of punisment. When the servant would seek permission to feed it, he would say, "Feed it , but make sure that you dont tell it that I know".
Madainee explains, a very respectable man came to Baghdad and wanted to send a letter with somebody to him father informnig him of his well-being. He could not find anybody to take the letter so he returned home himself and said to his father "It was not acceptable that you receive the news of my arrival in Baghdad and my well-being late, and I could not find anybody to send this letter with, so I have brought it myself." Having said this, he handed the letter to his father.
Once a governer passed by an ice seller and requested to taste a piece of the ice. He broke a piece from the block and gave it to him. After tasting it, the Governor said, "I want it colder than this". The ice seller, then broke off a piece of the other side and gave it to him. He tasted it and then enquired about the price. The ice seller replied, "The first piece is 1 Dirham per Rattal and the second is 1,5 Dirham per Rattal".
Abul Khair relates from a friend that he went to a place called Tahart. A criminal was brought to the court of the Kazee of Tahart who had commited such a crime regarding which there was no mention in the Quran or Sunnah.
He gathered the Jurists and asked them regarding the punisment. They wanted no involvement and replied "The problem is in your hands, do as you please".
He managed to solve the problem by randomly opening and closing the Quran 3 times. The last time he opened the quran, his eye fell on the verse "We shall brand him on the nose" (Surah Qalam verse 16).
Having taken this as a reasonable punishment, he cutt off the criminals nose.
I remembered something recently which suits this topic.
When I was around 8, we went India. Whilst wandering about near an auntie's house, I saw someone standing leaning on the door frame with his shoulders with a plate of Daar Chawal (Daal Chawal) in his hand.
He was eating in this position. He asked me "Can you eat like this?"
Now being well trained from a young age, I knew you can't eat standing so I nodded "no".
To my surprise he replied (proudly), "Check it out, I finished the whole thing"
He wasn't asking "Can you" as in "Should you" - He was asking "can you" as in "are you capable of". I mean big deal, I just saw a dog finishing his food standing too.
Abdur Rahman bin Missar relates that Qaadhee Abu Yusuf (Student of Imam Abu Hanifa and cheif justice of his time) appointed me as a judge of a place called Jeel. I was informed that the king, Haroon Rashid is going to pass by. On hearing this news, I called the people of Jeel and told them to praise and make good mention of me infront of the king. They promised and disappeared. On suspecting their promise, I lost hope in them. In order to impress the king, I combed my beard and personally went out of town and meet the king and Abu Yusuf near a place called Haraqa. I began to praise the Qaadhee of Jeel Immensely. Then all of a sudden Abu Yusuf recognized me and burts out in laughter. The king questioned him regarding his laughter. Abu Yusuf answered "The Qaadhee is praising himself". The king also started laughing and then ordered Qaadhee Abu Yusuf to sack him.
This cannot be undone and I am sure it will be greatly appreciated.
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