The Mind of an Asian

The Mind of an Asian

asalamu 'alykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh

Hope I don't offend anybody, I'm asian my self and I found this hilarious.

Enjoy!

The Mind of an Asian

Your entire family runs
the marathon when they see a dog (calmly
walking on
the other side
of the road)

Paracetamol"
is the cure to every illness

You studied A level Maths but still think it's possible
to fit
100 people into one car

You were taught never to
talk to strangers at primary school,
yet your parents force you to
call a complete stranger "uncle"

In primary school nativity plays
you were always the donkey in the
background and if you
were extra lucky, you were given the part
of the villager

The bus never stops for you

You achieve A*'s in every
subject and your parents tell you to STUDY HARDER

At home you have a butcher's knife which is bigger than your head

There is a tub of "PRIDE BUTTER
GHEE" and a sack of "TILDA BASMATI RICE" in your hallway

You think your life is
just one BIG INDIAN FILM

Unknown "relatives" start ringing your house on
the day that your exam results are coming out

Your parents have a PANIC ATTACK when something dirty comes on

You have to offer guests tea even before they've stepped into your house

You address every other Asian person on the planet as your "cousin"

You dress identical to your friends and your favourite colour is black

At weddings the cameraman
only ever films you when you're eating

You are
constantly being
compared to every other Asian kid on the planet

You have cousins that you've never heard of

You are unable to open your front door
because of the pile
of shoes blocking the way

You never buy bin bags, but use your saved grocery bags for it.

Your mother has a minor disagreement with her sister and doesn't
talk to her for ten years

Your mother does everything for you if you are a male

Your relatives alone could populate a small city

You went to a university as far away from home as
possible...and...you
still came back home to live with
your parents after
you have finished

You're walking out of
customs with your trolley at the airport and
you see all twenty-five
members of your family who have come to
pick you up.

You go back to your
parents' country and people treat you like
a member of the royal
family

To your English
friends, oil is used purely 4 cooking and not as
a grooming aid

Your mother measures wealth in gold and diamonds

No one ever seems to call ahead of time to say they are
coming over for a visit

Your parents drink 10 cups of tea a day

You eat onions with everything you use chilli sauce instead of tomato ketchup You have a 'Singer' or 'Brother'
sewing machine at home

The Mind of an Asian

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