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Conduct with the Ulema..

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#1 [Permalink] Posted on 29th May 2015 15:30

A thread for myself first about how one should be with the Ulema.. Sisters at times do wrong thinking they are doing the right thing.. And everyone can make mistakes.. This will Insha Allah help brothers understand too what one should do and what not..

 

Please move this into the sisters section if it should be moved into it.

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#2 [Permalink] Posted on 29th May 2015 16:16
Some things to keep in mind while conducting with the ulema..

1.Respect and honour them

2. Keep the talk as short as possible..

3. Be very formal

4. Its fine if you don't say Jazakumullahukhairan or thank you.

5.Use full forms.

6.Not all the time requests from them for Duas etc.

7. Make Duas for them, They really are a great blessing.

8. If something informal happens.. Ignore it. No apologies etc. (- my teacher)

9.No Hadya in asking regarding a. Deen question. But modesty in words and conduct.

10. Remember they are humans and can make mistakes.. You don't correct them every single time.

11. Before writing.. Think if this is relevant? Read the question / statement again.

12. Too much formality isn't too good. I remember there was a little maid who talked like mughals.. One knows how odd that seems..

Kindly add more..
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#3 [Permalink] Posted on 29th May 2015 16:43
In my opinion, sisters should have an email with clear anonymity, and since Ulama are now easily accessible through internet, they should be contacted through that medium.

For queries related to sisters only, use your usual email, so as the anonymity isn't revealed.

Though this idea seems simple and obvious, I feel its important to point out, and is in the best interest of the Alim and the questioner.

PS: Reliability of the Alim and his genuine contact address must always be confirmed beforehand.
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#4 [Permalink] Posted on 31st May 2015 17:11
one more thing I need to say which I should have said in the OPost.... Alhamdulillah I have much respect and high regard for Ulema... The purpose of this thread is not to say anything wrong regarding Ulema Hadhraat but rather to learn about how one should talk or what should be our conduct with them..
One of my teacher ( an alima) said that women call Imam Sahib and cry.. ( she wanted to let us know that this is not appropriate..) we stay modest because we are out to.. Not because the Alim is Naudhubillah bad..

Is it appropriate to send a smiley to Hadhrat to let him know you are smiling on anything? NO! because he is Hadhrat not your pal! That doesn't mean that The Hadhrat isn't good or something..

there are things we learn form experience.. or from other's experience.. so in this thread we can Insha Allah learn from experiences and Hikmah of our wise members..
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#5 [Permalink] Posted on 31st May 2015 18:02
Preferably, sisters should take the knowledge of deen from an Alima instead of an Alim, however, they can contact an alim through email/post and its content should be known to mother or father and husband (if married).
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#6 [Permalink] Posted on 1st June 2015 19:15
15. If you Masha Allah have access to ulema.. then don't disturb them too much.. as said by sister Ayesha Zainap.. "One question at a time"

Note: All this isn't only for sisters..
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#7 [Permalink] Posted on 31st January 2016 05:07
Female Mureed



Question:

My question is related to Bayah of a woman in Islam. My Wife has taken Bayah from a shaikh. She is very crazy to learn Tasawwuf. She says that to learn tasawwuf, I can meet my shaikh any time either in day or night and I shouldn't have any obligation on it. She also says that if I will resist she can demand DIVORCE even. I know the Shaikh and I have also taken Bayah from him. I have discussed this issue with Shaikh and he says that if she wants to see me alone, I should not resist and he will allow my wife to do so according to shariah. I am very disturb and don't know what to do. I am scared that if I say some hard words, our shaikh might angry on it. Please guide me in this regards.




Answer:

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu 'alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

The essence of Tasawwuf is Ihsaan, which means Allah consciousness. A person becomes ever conscious of the laws of Allah in every aspect of life. One can never achieve any heights in Tasawwuf while violating the laws of Allah. It is therefore important that the spiritual guide (Shaikh) himself strongly adheres to Shariah. If he violates the laws of Shariah, he cannot be an ideal role model for his followers. His guidance will lack spiritual light (ruhaniyyah).

According to Shariah, a woman cannot be alone with a ghair-mahram male. Rasulullah Sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said,


عَنِ ابْنِ عَبَّاسٍ، عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ " لاَ يَخْلُوَنَّ رَجُلٌ بِامْرَأَةٍ إِلاَّ مَعَ ذِي مَحْرَمٍ... "
Ibn `Abbas Radhiallahu anhu narrates: The Prophet Sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, "No man should stay with a woman in seclusion except in the presence of a Mahram..." [Sahih al-Bukhari 5233. Book 67, Hadith 166]

The Shaikh is a ghair-mahram. Your wife cannot be alone with him.
According to the above quoted Hadith, such a union is contaminated with the evils of Shaitan. How can one attain spiritual effulgence through such a meeting? In this era of moral degeneration, one should exercise extreme precaution. A mere curtain separating a ghair-mahram man and woman sitting alone too is not free from fitnah.
If a woman wishes to receive spiritual guidance and general advice, in this age of technology, that is very easy. She could email her spiritual guide rather than seeing him alone.

We have come across many incidents where Shaitan misled a ' Shaikh' with his female Mureeds. Furthermore, according to Shariah, the right of the husband precedes the right of the Shaikh. It is incorrect for the Shaikh to override the right of the husband and advise him against his will to let his wife see him.

The wifes attitude of wanting divorce if she cannot see the Shaikh requires reformation. Her Shaikh should advise her that Allah said,

...و قرن في بيوتكن ولا تبرجن تبرج الجاهلية الأولى...
And stay in your houses, and do not display yourselves like that of the times of ignorance... [Surah al-Ahzab:33]

Her Shaikh should advise her to obey her husband and in obeying the laws of the Shariah, she will get close to Allah. If the Shaikh facilitates her un-Islamic demands, then he is also guilty of violating the laws of Allah. He cannot be a means of leading people close to Allah. He is actually distancing his followers from Allah.



And Allah Ta'āla Knows Best


Bilal Issak
Student Darul Iftaa
Leicester, England, UK

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
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