Start With The Self.

Also some people were suspecting that something big is about to happen, and alot is going underground. When Hazrat Umer r.a. went to his last Hajj and he was in Arafaat, Hazrat Huzaifa r.a told Hazrat Umer r.a that there is lock on the doors of "fitna", once its un-locked, fitna will come out. When Hazrat Umer r.a heard it, he got nervous and asked him what door, and what is meant by its opening? So Hazrat Huzaifa said, a person will be killed"

Tabqat ibn Saad vol III, page 134.

So its not as simple as its portrayed, that out of no where Abu Lulu came and martyred Hazrat Umer r.a. He was just the glove, and not the real hand.

As Salaam Alaykum.

Jazak Allah brother Khanbaba/Saad this has clarified a lot of facts for me,

Allah bless the Sahabas and the Khalifa al Rashideen abundantly and give us the tawfiq to follow, in their footsteps and instil love in our hearts for them ameen

What a door that was one, whose very foundations were built on Justice and truth

As Salaam Alaykum.

I would just like to recommend some books that I am reading right know. concerning, this topic of Self reformation.

1) Purification of the Soul a compilation of works from earlier scholars such as Imam AlGhazali, Ibn Rajab al Hanbali and Ibn Qayim.

2) Remembrance of Death by Shaykh Zakarriya ,رضي الله عنه.A very small easy to read book, with excellent insights from hazrat Shaykh ul Hadeeth رضي الله عنه

3) Remedies for spiritual Maladies, By Hazrat Shaykh Hakeem Akhtar Shah (Sahib).
A an excellent section in this book dealing with,Lust and the malady of Love sickness.

Brothers and sisters feel free to make their own suggestion's, and contribute their thoughts on the issue of Self Reformation.

This Thread is turning more into a blog, rather then a forum.

May Allah give us the Tawfiq to practice what we Learn ameen.

The Two Dervishes

As Salaam Alaykum.

Two dervishes where traveling on a journey. During their journey they came across a Stream, by the Stream there was a young maiden.She was afraid to cross the stream for fear of her clothes getting wet. One of the dervishes offered to carry her across the river. When they got to the other side, she thanked the Dervishes and went on her way.

The Other Dervish started chiding the first one he said, "dont you know it is Haraam to have such physical contact, should you not repent."

So the first Dervish said:" indeed you are right I did make a gross error, I repent onto Allah."

But the other Dervish kept admonishing him for several miles: So the first dervish said
"Brother I only carried her across the stream, why are you still carrying her in your heart?

Story Taken from another source and Islamicised By Julaybib.

Two points to reflect.

Often we find people who have lived a sinful life, but they make Tawbah and start practicing their deen, yet we keep reminding them of their past behavior and judging them for it.

Secondly like the dervish in the afore- mentioned story, when we are judging others or admonishing others we don't stop to ponder on our own inner intentions or desires. Surely our admonishments should be purely for the sake of Allah and to bring others closer to the deen.


May Allah protect us all from passing Judgement, on others give us the tawfiq to reflect on our own intentions, ameen.

'Why do you say that which you do not do?' (Quran)


أَتَأۡمُرُونَ ٱلنَّاسَ بِٱلۡبِرِّ وَتَنسَوۡنَ أَنفُسَكُمۡ وَأَنتُمۡ تَتۡلُونَ ٱلۡكِتَـٰبَ*ۚ أَفَلَا تَعۡقِلُونَ

Do you order people to do good and forget your own selves, even though you have read the book, do you not have sense? (Quran)

those are only the ones of the top of my head.... there are plenty more, each accurate in the description of man's haste to rectify others' mistakes whilst ignoring his own.
May Allah guide us all. ameen.

As Salaam Alaykum:

A Young professor of botany arrived at a small village, to study the local plant species, he met an old Man ,and asked him if there where any guest houses near by, where he could stay for the night. The old man said there where no guest houses, but he would be honoured if he would stay with him,besides he lived on his own and would really enjoy some company.

As the evening progressed the subject turned towards religion. The young professor started boasting about his religious Knowledge, the Young professor had studied the works of Imam Ghazali رضي الله عنه, Shaykh Abdul Qadir Gilani رضي الله عنه amongst many others.

The Old Man was fascinated to hear the words, of the great Scholars being relayed to him, and listened intently. The old man noticed that despite the young professors vast Knowledge , of religion, he did not offer prayers, nor was his manner of sitting speaking or even eating according to the sunnah.

The young Professor carried on boasting, about his Knowledge . Finally the old man spoke and said " my Son Only a blind man knows the value of eyesight, whilst those of us who are blessed with it take it for granted. My son I have spent my entire life in regret that, I am illiterate and cannot read and I did not get the opportunity, to learn from the great works of all the scholars you have mentioned. Yet I ask you my son what is the use of all the knowledge you have gained, when you cannot bring yourself to make one sajda before your creator, what use is such knowledge my son? The young Professor, was silenced upon hearing this. He announced he was tired and went to sleep. The old mans wise counsel had no effect on him."

Story Written by Julaybib.


Something to think about:

Is not our condition like the young professor, we study book after book, we spend hours listening to lectures; Yet we have no inclination to put into practice what we learn. Even admonishments, come to us whether through illness, poverty or other afflictions yet we remain in slumber, and like the young Professor we fall asleep, we gain nothing from our knowledge other than arrogance and boast fullness.


May Allah give us all the tawfiq to practice what we learn and embrace Islam in its entirety especially a Sinner like me ameen.

As salaam Alaykum:

Jazak Allah for the reminder sister,

May Allah give us all the tawfeeq to see our own faults and to rectify them ,ameen.

As Salaam Alaykum;

Sultan Ibrahim ibn Adam رضي الله عنه was a Saint who gave up his Kingdom, and chose to spend his life in worship; Somebody once asked him "you gave up kingship of the land of Balkh, did you ever feel in your heart remorse."

He replied: " only one time did a thought of self pity occur to me, I had been walking barefoot for days my feet were swollen and wounded I was in extreme pain, I felt regret that I had no Shoes; All of a sudden I heard the Azaan, and as I was heading towards the Mosque, I saw a man entering the mosque and he was crawling on his hands for he had no feet; I said to myself you complain that you have no shoes, yet this servant of Allah has no feet, at that moment I fell down in repentance"

Something to reflect:

"I complained that I had no Shoes yet he had no feet." How many of us think like this, we see people all around us who live in worst circumstances then us;
When a calamity strikes we complain and say why did this happen to me?
We are completely devoid of exercising patience at times of difficulty or expressing gratitude for the blessings we have. Do we ever reflect on how blessed the gift of eyesight is; Or how blessed we are if we have the ability to walk. We never look at those who are blind or in wheelchairs and reflect at how fortunate we are.

We only notice those who have more wordly things than us and complain how deprived we are."


Allah give us all the tawfeeq to express gratitude and exercise patience in all circumstances ,especially a hypocrite like me who is completely devoid of these qualities ameen

Assalamualikum,

I had made mention of this point before, but I would just like to elaborate as it deals with the topic, of this thread.

Seven Steps Of Highly Effective Muslims - lecture By Shaikh Hamza Yusuf

Pointers on the Sphere of Influence and Circle Of Concern:

Circle of concern -

As Muslims we need to be concern about what is happening to Bosina, Iraq, Egypt, Palestine. As the one who is not concern about the affairs of the Muslims is not from among them - Hadith.

We have a wide circle of concern, it even transgress the ummah because we are concerned about the kuffar as well - because it is our duty to spread the deen to them, hence Muslims have a huge circle of concern.

Sphere of Influence -

Our circle of influence is limited, each one of us has a limited amount of work we can do, we need to recognise our limitations. All of us have something which we are in charge of and we would be responsible only for our circle of influence, Allah will not take us to account for things outside our responsibility.

It is our circle of influence to effect that greater circle of concern. If we focus on our circle of influence and not on our circle of concern, the effect is that our circle of influence increase by the nature of it. But, if we are always focusing on our circle of concern and forget what we can actually do, the circle of influence decreases.

wa'salam

As Salaam Alaykum:

I remember a brother talking about a shaykh (whose name I have unfortunately forgotten) This shaykh moved to a new neighbourhood in Florida. "On the first day he moved into his new home, he went and knocked on every door on his street and politely introduced himself. Occasionaly when he went shopping, he would buy something for his neighbours. If he was mowing the lawn in his garden,
he would go say to his neighbours. " You Know I am mowing my lawn anyway, Would like me to do your garden when I am finished." If one of his neighbours fell ill he would visit them regularly and offer to help out in what ever way he can. On occasions he would be seen with a Broom stick in his hand sweeping the entire street.

The Neighbours who were all Non-Muslim , when they went on holiday would leave there house keys with him. In short all the people grew to love him and had great respect for Islam, now he never preached to anyone, he acted as a muslim and inculcated the Ikhlaq and characteristics of our pious predecessors. By this means his every action became dawah. The greatest method of Dawah is indeed through action.

Similarly Shaykh Hussain Abdul Sattar states in one of his lectures Shaykh Zulfiqar Ahmed (db) told one of his mureeds who started a new job , and the Mureed was upset because the pay was'nt so good the Shaykh told him to be patient and work in such a way, that your Employers will think how will we survive if he leaves, the Mureed did as he was told within a few months he got promoted and started receiving a larger paycheck. Imagine the repect his Employers would have developed for Islam, just by the fact they had a muslim employee who was doing more work then he was being payed for.

Something to reflect:

What is the state of our condition, we will carry a grudge with a neighbor for years over something trivial. If we have a job we do less amount of work then we are being payed for if we get Payed $10 an hour we only do $5 amount of work. Through our behavior our own relatives and friends are driven away from the deen. We preach to them about Islam, yet our Ikhlaq and Adaab is far removed from Islam.

It is narrated that a few muslims went to a Zoroastrian and started preaching to him the words of Islam. The Zoroastrian said " If it is the Islam of Abu yazid al Bistami رضي الله عنه ( the famous saint) you are talking about I fear that I will not be able to do it justice . If it is the Islam that you people practice I am sorry I cannot believe in it for your very actions repulse me.

May Allah give us all the tawfiq to practice the deen in its entirety and in particular a sinner like me ameen.

Salaam,

I think this is a great thread! I will admit that I often catch myself looking for the faults in others and their actions, when I myself am not short of things I can improve on. It's only in the last little bit that I've decided I will try my best to stop worrying about what other people do and just work on myself and hope to set a good example. This certainly will not be easy.

The stories and anecdotes are really good too. Thank you![/quote]

A human is never satisfied

[quote Julaybib]
As Salaam Alaykum.

Jazak Allah for your kind comments, I would humbly request your duas as I am not in the best of health at the moment.

I would just like to point out that my posts in this thread are not a reflection of who I am but who I am struggling with great difficulty to become. The defects I have highlighted are the ones I have noticed In myself, may Allah forgive me and give me hidayyah.


I remember visiting a Fabric store in Pakistan. During my conversation with the owner he stated:

" Brother I came to Pakistan as a refugee from Afghanistan, I used to go from village to village selling various goods, walking on foot for miles, I prayed that Allah give me a Motorbike and all my problems would be solved. Allah blessed me with a Motorbike then I had a desire that if only I had a Truck then my livelihood would increase, and the financial difficulties would be solved for me and my family. Allah blessed me with a Truck I then thought to myself If only I had a store, Allah has now blessed me with a Shop.

Brother when I was walking Barefoot I was Poor now that I have become a Shopkeeper earning thousands of rupees I am still poor. Yesterday I was poor , today I am still poor The heart of a Human is never satisfied."


It is Narrated that a man came to Shaykh Junaid Al Baghdadi : and Presented a gift of gold coins for the Shaykh and his students. The Shaykh handed him the money back and said: "we do not require anything from a poor man like your self." The man said "I am very wealthy." The shaykh said:" Do you desire an increase in your wealth" the man said:"Yes of course". The Shaykh said: "Despite all that Allah has blessed you with your heart still desires more, who can be more poor then you are, take your money for you are more in need of it than us."

May Allah Make our hearts content with what we have, and remove the disease of poverty in our hearts ameen.

"The Greatest Role Model Of All Times."

As Salaam Alaykum

This is a simple reminder, for myself and everyone else, to visit the thread dedicated to our Beloved Prophet () on this forum, and learn about him and Insha allah increase the love for him in our hearts.

The whole purpose of this thread is to reform ourselves and inculcate virtues of proper Ikhlaq and Adaab in ourselves, these virtues are the virtues from the Fragrant and Beautiful character of our Prophet () and who ever has sought to emulate these virtues has become elevated.

A few words from shaykh Masood Azhar Mujahid (db).He states:

" They say that Islam was spread by the sword.I also say that Islam was Spread by the Sword, It was the Sword of our Prophet () Ikhlaq.
This was the sword of compassion that was instilled into the heart of
Abu Bakrرضي الله عنه,by our Beloved Prophet () .
It was the Sword of Justice instilled into the heart of Umar al farooq رضي الله عنه,by our Beloved Prophet () . It was the Sword of Kindness that was instilled into the heart of Usman رضي الله عنه by our beloved prophet It was the sword of Mercy that Was instilled in the heart of Ali رضي الله عنه."

The Beloved Messenger of Allah peace and blessings be upon him was the Greatest role model of all times , May allah give us all the tawfiq to love him as he should be loved and to follow his sunna as it should be followed and may the sword of his Ikhlaq be instilled in our hearts ameen.

As Salaam Alaykum.

A wealthy trader was one day clearing some of his old correspondence letters, He came across a letter he received about six months earlier, from a man whose small furniture making business was failing, this man had written a letter to the wealthy trader asking for advice. The wealthy trader had written a reply at that time, with advice to the furniture maker in how to improve his business.

Reading the letter once again the wealthy trader decided to write another letter he stated.

" As I was clearing out my desk, I came across the letter you wrote to me six months ago.I hope things In your business have Inshallah improved , reading your letter I was reminded of my earlier days when I first started out, it was a mighty struggle many time I thought of giving up, but I was heavily in debt I could not afford to shut down my business. Eventually I managed to get one client then another, from there my business really took of and I have never looked back. So my friend my message to you is never ever give up in the end the struggle will have been worth it, the fruits of success will taste that much sweeter, and Allah is with those who have Sabr (patience and fortitude) at times of difficulty.

A year went by and the Wealthy trader one day received another letter from the same man, in his busy life he had all but forgotten about that furniture maker, he was completely amazed when he read the letter:It said.

" I would like to thank you for saving my life, a year ago my business was not running I was heavily in debt and my creditors were breathing down my neck demanding repayment of their loans on top of that I was struck by illness, I felt completely drained both emotionally and Physically. I was in total despair the only way out I could see was to take my own life , By the grace of Allah the day I was planning to commit suicide is the same day I received your letter. You told me of your own struggles and advised me to never give up, that things would eventually improve. After reading your letter I felt re-energised I thought if this man went through the same struggle as I am to achieve success then things cant really be that bad. Well a year on business is booming, my life has improved beyond my wildest dreams all thanks to your kind words of support."

Now the wealthy trader had no idea his words would have such an impact, he just wrote that letter out of human sympathy but he ended up saving a mans life. Allah had used his words of kindness to help save the other mans life.

Story Written by Julaybib.


Something to Ponder:

How often do we take time to offer encouragement and support to a close relative ,let alone a complete stranger. often our relatives, friends and colleuges are going through difficult times yet do we show any sympathy, or kindness, we are generous in our words of criticism but very miserly when it comes to offering words of kindness.

Do we ever show consideration towards others as we are going about our daily business. How many times have we felt slighted , when we for example have come across a miserable shop assistant or a cashier in a store, do we ever stop to think that person may be miserable because they have had a bad day or perhaps is facing other difficulties in their personal lives , do we ever consider smiling and saying a few kind words.

Even in situations when we do offer support, we often forget about the other person after a few days, we never think of contacting that person after some weeks to see if things have improved or if they need any further help. On this forum how many of us bother maintaining contact with those who are clearly in distress , and in a state of desperation.

Smiling when you greet others, offering words of kindness and compassion are from the Sunnah of our Beloved Prophet . Yet we completely fail to act in accordance to them.

May Allah give us all the tawfeeq to act with kindness and compassion toward others ameen.

P.S remember to visit the excellent thread dedicated to our Beloved Prophet .

As Salaam Alaykum.

Imam Al ghazali رضي الله عنهWrote to a Student.

My dear son.

Hear one more thing from me and contemplate about it until you find salvation. If you were informed that the Sultan was going to select you for appointment as a minister, Know that in the course of this period you would not engage in anything but improving your garments or body, your house or its furnishings-anything you thought the sultans eye would be cast upon. Now think about what I have indicated to you, for you for you are quick witted and a few words are sufficient for you. Did not the Messenger of Allah
say : " Verily Allah does not look to your outward appearances, nor to your actions, but he looks to your hearts and your intentions.
If you want to know the different states of the heart then lookin the Ihya ulum al din."

* Source My dear Beloved Son - It is a series of letters from Imam al ghazali رضي الله عنه to a student
* For those who dont know the Ihya ulum Al din (revival of the religious sciences)is Imam Al ghazalis رضي الله عنه greatest work, and was taught in sunni Madrasas for centuries.

For those interested in self improvement I would highly recommend the above two works.


May Allah help us purify both our hearts and our intentions. ameen.