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Marriage’s Influence on Progeny | Inamul Hasan Kandhlawi

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#1 [Permalink] Posted on 24th May 2022 20:58
This is an excerpt from one of Inamul Hasan Kandhlawi’s speeches. Its translated more or less meaning. My notes are in brackets. Speech given in 80s.

If we adopt the correct practice (of simplicity in marriages) this will provide ease in fulfilling our needs and this will have an effect on character of the future children. There is an effect of parents on the children. Its not such that the parents do as they please and the children will not be affected.

In the past, post marriage, both boy and girl would adopt sobriety that its no longer just about us rather we are now responsible for the future progeny as well. Not like today where after marriage both feel they are unaccountable. Because they lack understanding and follow their whims /desires harming themselves. In life of this world there are worries and Allah only knows what is in store in the hereafter. Its lack of focus on death, hereafter, life and one’s offspring.

That people lament the challenge of instilling character in their children and what aught be the correct method, the cause being we want to live according to our desires but the children should not. No, this way is not the method of edifying children. What we do (following desires), our children will surpass us. Today, parents they can be dishonest, live in disarray, follow unlawful desires and this shall not have any effect on children, this is not possible.

This is why when there was that worry and concern for future progeny, the nurturing of children was priority. After marriage even in privacy they wouldn’t say anything offensively impolite as perhaps it will have a (detrimental) effect on the child. But in today’s life, everywhere you hear everyone is frustrated about children. And we cannot come up with a solution. This is because they themselves are not willing to bound, confine themselves (to orders of Allah) and thread correct path.

Until there is no reformation in the environment, there is never going to be an improvement in future generation. A child just through sayings, explanation will not understand as much compared by what he sees and understands through his environment. Just like there is bad environment, without any regard child will perform bad actions. You are doing a bad action, he will start doing it. If you are doing a good action, he will do it.

Betterment of environment is a means of edification for future generation. But if the environment is corrupt, our speeches will have no effect. If our actions have swearing, abuse and evil in the home, then the child without any mention will succumb and perform these actions himself. If our actions have remembrance of Allah, works pleasing to Allah, order of Allah is being fulfilled in home then the child without any instruction will perform these actions himself.

My dear friends Allah has placed necessity of marriage in human beings and provided guidance on how to fulfill that need. As much simplicity, obedience to Allah is present this will in turn have an effect on future progeny, they will then possess good character. When human beings are able to fulfill commandments of Allah, there will be harmony in life and in hereafter the progeny of Adam will attain salvation.
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