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28
Jun
2011

Polygamy

28th June 2011
Ta'addud Zawjaat in Islam (Polygyny)

Academic,Logical and Practical discussion of Polygyny. Why it is necessary in our time!

Taken from http://taaddud.blogspot.com/

It's as natural as the first..
So i was talking to a person in Masjid e Nabawi. The conversation soon changed to Ta'addud (it always ends up there :) ).

So He said, Shoof Habibi, You should do istikhara whether to marry again or not!

I asked him, Would you ever do Istikhara for marrying the first time? (He's unmarried)

He said, ummm.. amm.. ooonh...

I said, Well you will never do istikhara because you know that marrying the first time is as natural as it gets. You never do istikhara whether to eat food or not. You will never do istikhara whether to sleep or not. But, you will do istikhara about the girl you are going to marry. You will do istikhara if this girl is best for me or not. But you will never do istikhara about marriage itself.

So,

The Ta'addud is as natural as the first one. You can do istikhara about the woman you are going to marry but doing istikhara whether to marry the second time or not does not make alot of sense.

This type of advices are given because Ta'addud has become a strange alien thing.

ما اصدق حبيبنا صلي الله عليه وسلم لما قال: بدا الاسلام غريبا وسيعود غريبا فطوبي للغرباء

Our Beloved Prophet صلي الله عليه وسلم said: Islam started as a stranger, Soon it will become strange again, so glad tidings are for the strangers....

The common perception of this hadith is that the complete Islam will become strange. This is also true but another aspect which Ulama say is that different aspects of Islam will become strange. Like ta'addud for instance. You will find thousands of practicing muslims who view ta'addud as strange.

Long hair have become strange today. It is a Sunnah of our beloved Prophet صلي الله عليه وسلم

'Imama (Turban) has also become strange.

Getting back to the topic. Ta'addud is a natural process. A person marrying for the first time will never be advised to do istikhara about getting married then WHY (we will have alot of whys in our blog :)) is a person who intends to get a second wife is advised to do istikhara about it?

Only because it has become strange and our minds fail to accept it as normal. Our minds can't perceive it as normal. We show automatic negative reactions. Some will go outright telling you its a cheap thing, others will take a more soft approach and try to convince you in different way as to why you shouldn't practice ta'addud today.

It's time we make Islam the norm and break all the other idols which stand in the way of Islam. The idol of culture, the idol of society, the idol of media.. All these need to be broken. It's time...

WHY?

السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته

What made me start this blog? (Again taken from the link above)

Thousands of reasons...

Two days ago I read a letter from an unmarried girl to a Sheikh. It made my heart move. Here are some excerpts from the letter:


I just make one due to Allah day/night, ya Allah please decrease the number of women......

Allah has intended men to have more than one wife. It is essential to maintain the balance of society. If we oppose it, and we make Ta'addud into a crime, Would Allah reduce the NUMBER of WOMEN just because WE DONT LIKE IT?



No one wants to marry deeni girls today. Only married people are ready to marry them and that too just to have more children. This is her real status Who will answer my questions? For Allah's sake, please give me some amal which will finish this DESIRE [to marry]. Why has Allah put this DESIRE in women when they can't get married in this country? Mominaahs are not accepted? The desire to SUICIDE increases when alone. WHEN WILL I DIE???


Allah has already given us a solution.We are at mistake for not following it. If Ta'addud was not seen as a crime, this girl would be living peacefully with a husband.


Ta'addud Zawjaat is an integral and natural part of Islam. It has been in practice since a long time. But today, it is made into a crime, a crime so worse that anyone even talking about polygamy is thought to be a criminal. Why?

All laws made by Allah are for our benefit. It is we who oppose those laws. Then when calamities hit us, we complain.

Yet we forget:

ظَهَرَ الْفَسَادُ فِي الْبَرِّ وَالْبَحْرِ بِمَا كَسَبَتْ أَيْدِي النَّاسِ لِيُذِيقَهُمْ بَعْضَ الَّذِي عَمِلُوا لَعَلَّهُمْ يَرْجِعُونَ
Calamities have appeared on land and sea because of what the hands of the people have earned, so that He (Allah) makes them taste some of what they did, in order that they may return (to the right way).


Problems in society arise when we oppose the same law:


Hadith:

When a person comes to you (for your sister or daugther) and you are pleased with his Deen and Akhlaq then marry [your daughter or sister] to him. If you don't do this, there will be Fitnah of Earth and Big Fasad. [Tirmidhi]

This blog will consist mainly articles about Ta'addud but some other things might be added from time to time.

We will try to discuss the academic, logical and practical aspects of Ta'addud in detail. We will try to address the problems created in our society due to the lack of it. We will also try to address the common objections that are made on Ta'addud.

May Allah help us.

جزاك الله خيرا

FROM A BLOG POST BY BROTHER MADNI
Tags: taaddud
posted by abu mohammed on 28th June 2011 - 2 comments

2 Comments

Majid wrote on 28 Jun 2011
Assalam Alaikum.

I have two questions that I hope someone can answer:
1. If a young man is say in education and living purely on scholarship and grants enough only so that he can support himself, is it right to get married based on the fact that neither can he financially support a wife nor emotionally as he has to spend most of the time working.
2. As regards to ta'addud: if a man is married is it farz, wajib, sunnah or just permitted to marry again? How about if this man is happy in his marriage and does not feel he can provide or take care of another wife. More importantly he believes that he will treat the wives differently and unfairly.

JazakaAllah
Blogger's Reply:
I will add your comment on the thread here www.muftisays.com/forums/articles-stories-more/5375/polygamy-%96-an-alternative-way-of-life-.html

Maybe some one will answer, please kep in touch.

From my understanding, and im not a scholar, Allah provides rizk, it is in his hand. Ome should not shy away from marriage with fear of poverty. Secondly, it is not Farz or Wajib, it is Sunnah and permitted if need be.
 
se wrote on 22 Mar 2013
it was disliked by the Ansaar and the Prophet sal Allahu alayhi wasalam told the Muhajireen to not do it to an Ansari woman. Therefore, if polygamy is disliked by a certain culture (eg. north american woman), you should not do it to her.
Blogger's Reply:
Jazakallahu khair,

Please note: Polygamy is not allowed in Islam. What is allowed is Polygyny, there is a small difference.

I understand fully what you are trying to say and agree somewhat.
 
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