Source: http://qa.muftisays.com/?1778
Question ID: #1778
 
Question: Guidance in Marraige
Aslamalakum

I am now 30 years of age and whilst I believe that marriage happens when a person is ready to accept it in thier lives and when Allah swt has decreed that moment. I dont think that the community I live in do accept this. I live with my sick father and we have to care for him which has delayed my marriage but one day my mother and I went to a friends house who had been to hajj there we met with other ladies and they got talking about marriage I came home very distressed as it has distressed my mother. I wen to sleep that night with a very heavy heart just before fajar I dreamt of the Prophet (saw) in my dream I didnt see his face and I was signing my marriage contract with him I was dressed in white, I took this dream as a kind of dream that was giving me courage and that marriage will come. What would your thoughts be and how would you advise me to pursue marriage I dont have brothers to look for a partner for me and my mother and I keep our selves to ourselves so how should I look for a partner I do work but keep my boundaries and do not feel that this is an environment where I should transgress them what would your advise be on this?
 
 
Answered by: Ulamaa ID 14 (Misc)
Date: 15/05/2012 23:21pm

Bismillahir Rahmaanir Raheem
Al Jawaab Billahit-Tawfeeq

Respected sister
Allah (SWT) is the Creator and Destiner. We have no doubt in that. Allah (SWT) also wills things to happen at the best time even if this may be out of sphere of understanding. Therefore, a delay in you getting married, is part of Allah (SWT)’s plan which we cannot question. It is a known fact that communities sometimes do not understand this and may make one feel inferior and despondent. However Allah (SWT) knows best. From your description of the situation, it seems as if you are needed to assist your parents, in particular your father. Hence, marriage will come when Allah (SWT) deems it appropriate. Please do not ever lose hope as Allah (SWT) will make all things possible.
It is indeed commendable that you have not broken the laws of the Shariah in this regard and that you have waited patiently for Allah (SWT) to send you your partner. As your father cannot assist in this matter, it is advisable that maybe your uncles or any other mahram try and arrange for a suitor. If this is not possible then maybe you could speak to the local Imaam or Ulama of your area.
Also turn to Allah (SWT) in abundance and Insha Allah your duas will be answered.



And Allah knows best
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