Been Trying to Investigate The Past, Did I Utter in Loud Voice or Not? If Uttered was it dorected to

Assalamualaikum, I've been investigating for almost 2 years, I can't forget the date it was 22 September 2024, I was alone at home. I remember thinking about the rulings of talak 1 and talak 3, I was thinking which one can reconcile and which one can't reconcile. While thinking, I may have uttered a sentence regarding talak. But after that day, I kept questioning and I keep trying to know if the utterance was made in loud voice or soft voice or just mouthing without voice? I also keep trying to find out if it was uttered, did I mention my wife or not at all? Did I say talak 1 or talak 3 if it was uttered? After too many times trying to remember, I get more confused about what really happened. From my understanding, divorce doesn't count if it's not attributed or directed to wife and also if sound was not produced. My main worries are : 1. Did I utter in loud voice or whispering or mouthing without voice at all? 2. Was it directed to wife by saying "you" or "my wife" or did not mention wife at all? 3. If it was uttered, was it talak 1 or talak 3?