Mukarram
1
Question:
Assalamualaikum, a little background first :im almost 18 year old struggling to be a good Muslim, I find deen very hard I've also been diagnosed with OCD waswas affect me but alhumdullilah I'm getting better
my question is about fiqh , my parents raised me in hanafi fiqh and I mostly do hanafi stuff but when I was young and through Internet I found other rulings on some matters and started following them cause I didn't know what taqleed was and I had doubts and I followed what trusted sites on the Internet said like islamweb and islamqa I didn't know they were hanbali but they did gave ahaidth reasoning so I jus followed them
not many but few matters like witr, sajda as sahw and combining salah I follow methods and rulings which aren't hanfi , so do be clear
non-hanafi stuff that i do and follow
1. I pray witr method ( 1 rakah or 3 straight no sitting) ,
2.sajda as sahu method before and after Salam,
3.not making up missed salah with qaza only repentance that I missed due to ignorance intentionally only making those up I missed due to sleeping or forgetting
4.also v imp combining salah due to necessity mostly like when I'm outside the house and eg I went to public washrooms and I feel impure Ocd and even if not I usually choose to jus go home and combine .
5. I also rarely pray sunnah mukkadah only fajr 2 sunnah rest rarely and witr too rarely basically I don't because I struggle to keep up with farz in the first place and I've heard in hanafi fiqh leaving sunnah mukkadh is sinful cuz it's almost farz which is wajib
I can't remember more stuff but maybe probably there's more I don't know and again doubts , these doubts have ruined my life
I've now realized how important is it for ease to do taqleed and follow one madhab and me being a nobody I can't jus Google and all . I'm inspired by my dr israr ahmed a famous pakistani scholar and he followed hanfi too but he did do some things differently like Raful yadain but he decided to do so as he's a scholar I'm not I'm a common Muslim a layman
now please advise ne what to do should I change few stuff like how I pray witr and sajda as sahu and do just all hanafi or can I still follow the other fiqh ruling cause I've been doing that for long time and it will be hard and as we know all fiqh are on haq , I feel like changing again is going to be hard for me and the reason I did follow these mixed fiqh rulings is bcs I didn't understand fiqh I jus googled my issue and followed what most said or authentic and sometimes I'm going to be honest the easy opinion esp in combing salah cause it feels so heavy sometimes
also I'm getting waswas about hanfi fiqh cause i hear so much saudi and arabi scholar say abu hanifa fiqh is different from ahadith but we all believe everyone is on haq , so again I'm doubting is my state of being mostly hanafi wrong? Or like if someone is fully hanafi are they wrong
and Abu hanfia himself said if anyone finds his ruling against ahadith to follow tha authentic ahadith
so like for eg can I be hanafi in all aspects except a few like witr( 1 rakat) sajda as sahu combining salah , qaza
Due to constant doubts which started from cleanliness the time I started to try to become a better muslim, went to doubts in salah , now on doubts in eman j have a doctor and I'm taking meds that too Idk how that's going I'm jus hoping I find some guidance , Allah is most merciful if I don't do what's hard and maybe choose somethjngs that's easy or convenient I hope He ignores it . It's convenient for me to jus do what I've been doing since I got into religon like being most hanafi jus few aspects that are of other school of thoughts.
Please consider my entire situation and advise me on what to do.
