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Few questions abt personal state

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#1 [Permalink] Posted on 14th May 2019 19:35
Hi all i need to know about few things. Kindly help me in that. I shall be grateful.

1. I heard about pride and other spiritual diseases they could be cure. How about Hating everyone? I have recently found out that i hate rather look down at others. I don’t have any love for anyone. I want to love and respect others unconditionally. How can I change myself?

2.if a person is good then by doing sins continuously, ignores his duties and he gets bad... and gets far away from Allah and feels disconnected even with family. Is it possible to get back to original state and to feel connected?

Other thing is that if a person has been indulged in a life without the remembrance of Allah... but he had the intention that soon will start life of positivity. Till that he kept on with life of ghaflah alongside collecting info abt deen and listening to lectures. But at end when decide to start a life of Deen he feels disconnected from every one including himself too. No sign of goodness.

Can such person be changed? How?

And his intentions were good why this negative personality changed happened? As actions are based on intentions. He always intended that he will get close to Allah soon and in result he was downed to the level even from what he really was. Also why his bad deeds looked good to him? He was happy all that almos 10-15 !years (while completing studies too) that Allah is with him but that was not right. Now the idea is shattered when started Salah and zikar. Now feel disconnected.

3. Other people I witnessed does too much haram deeds they are ok and don’t get disconnected with Allah not with themselves. They have good expectations from Allah n love themselves too. Why this disconnection happened to him for his sins?

4. It seems like the heart has darkened n no feelings. Can it be cured? How and how long would it take? Plz suggest some fast remedies thanks


Please i shall be very thankful to throw some light on these topics and make them clear. I dont see a scholar to contact to. Someone said abt ur forum thats why i came here to get benefit from your knowledge. May Allah give u its reward. Ameen.
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#2 [Permalink] Posted on 14th May 2019 21:05
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Assalam o Alaikum,

1. It is a healthy sign that one has started finding one's own faults and one is repentant on one's actions and one's past.
2. It is a healthy sign that one is feeling emptiness in one's heart because of a life full of sin and without remembrance of Allah and dhikr.

3. Allah likes quality and not quantity and Allah likes consistency and not random bursts of large amount of nafl ibadah.

4. Keep offering regular prayers, keep doing morning and evening dhikr. Keep abstaining from sins and the environment of sins. Keep reciting the Quran. Start from one page daily and increase to the number you are comfortable with. Protect your eyes, ears, mind and body from sins. Don't intermingle with the non mehram and opposite sex. Avoid TV, music etc. Leave the bad things one by one at a time at a gradual and moderate pace. Don't overwhelm your nafs.

5. The more black one's heart is the more time will it take to polish it through dhikr and good amaal. Once your heart is clean enough you will feel connected again. Keep making dua and keep being in good company and keep doing good deeds and keep avoiding bad deeds and keep avoiding bad company and keep repenting in front of Allah and don't expose your sins and Insha Allah one day you will feel the sweetness of iman.

6. Three adhkar are intensely powerful.
a. The First Kalima (100x morning and 100x evening)
b. Any durood (100x morning and 100x evening)
c. Astaghfirullah (100x morning and 100x evening)

Make these adhkar a habit. The minimum you should do is do it 100 times each morning and evening.

A person's soul (subconscious) goes through three stages.

a. Nafs e Ammarah (Animal nature of a person which derives pleasure from haram actions and sins. Doesn't care of what it's doing. Just want to gather things of pleasure. Doesn't care about halal or haram. Gets furious quickly as soon as anything happens against it's wishes etc)

b. Nafs e Lawwamah (A state of mind where a person realizes the truth. Is repentant on his actions. Is sad about his sins. Can easily be influenced by good or bad company. Sometimes is motivated to do good. Sometimes slips and commits a sin. However, the difference between this state and the state of Nafs e Ammarah is that Nafs e Ammarah used to get pleasure from sin and didn't feel any burden in it's conscious afterwards where as nafs e lawwamah feels bad after committing the sin. During this state that the battle of good and evil has now begin in one's soul. Before that our soul was settled on sin. Now the light of good has shined a bit and it is fighting the darkness inside us and the darkness is resisting this light of good. etc)

c. Nafs e Mutmainnah (A state of mind where the goodness has won the battle and has subdued the evilness inside us. Now it is more easy for us to do good instead of doing bad. Now our nafs feels genuine and true pleasure in good deeds and is highly shocked in even minor sins. We feel more connected to Allah in this stage. Evilness cannot be completely gone, however it can be subdued. Nafs e Ammarah wanted to grab material possessions where as Nafs e Mutmaiinnah is the complete opposite. It wants to give and give. It takes pleasure in giving instead of grabbing and snatching. etc)

During the state of Nafs e Ammarah any event of disaster or a shocking powerful naseeha of a pious person can shake it and a person can start thinking that what is he doing. If he accepts the dawah or takes that disaster or loved one lost or possession lost as a sign from Allah and accepts the truth then it upgrades to Nafs e Lawwamah. If the Nafs e Lawammah keeps the company of pious and is persistent in good deeds despite the temptations of the heart then after some time it upgrades to Nafs e Mutmainnah. The more effort you make with sincerity, devotion and higher quality, the more quickly you will be upgraded to Nafs e Mutmainnah.

My 2 cents.
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#3 [Permalink] Posted on 14th May 2019 21:12
How to do Dhikr

Don't do dhikr without contemplation. It will be effective without contemplation but will have minimum impact.

Keep the meanings of dhikr in mind while doing it.

1. First Kalimah. On "La ilaha" think that the love of anything other than Allah is leaving your heart. On "Illallah" think that Allah's love is entering your heart. On "Muhammad ur Rasoolullah" think that the love of Prophet SAWS is entering your heart.

2. On durood "Think that your are sending Salutations on the Prophet SAWS because he sacrificed all of his life and worldly pleasures for your iman's sake. You are Muslim today because of his effort and sacrifices".

3. On Astaghfirullah "Think about your sins and feel ashamed and repentant for them".

Insha Allah! You will feel more positive and energetic after each session of dhikr.

Remember! Consistency is the key. Don't despair of the mercy of Allah.
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#4 [Permalink] Posted on 15th May 2019 00:13
Thread moved from Q&A support where answering is not permitted by members except to post existing answers from scholars. As this is more about the state of the mind the title has been updated and thread moved to people's say.
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#5 [Permalink] Posted on 15th May 2019 22:17
Bismillah.

As Salaamu Alaykum.

The following two threads in links I have posted at the bottom of this post are on self improvement they might help... in addition to that I would recommend you find some study circles, or masjid that have regular weekly lectures. Being and feeling isolated is major obstacle in progressing in ones spiritual journey...pious companionship is a must and will help make the journey alot of easier....the zikr that has the quickest impact and helps inculcate feelings of peace and serenity is sending Selawat on the Prophet (saw) you must do this abundantly through out the day.


www.muftisays.com/forums/27-sharing-portal/9956-start-wit...

www.muftisays.com/forums/13-articles--stories--more/11306...
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#6 [Permalink] Posted on 16th May 2019 01:53
sipraomer wrote:
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Walekom Asalaam .. Thank you so much for the kind and lengthy reply. I thought my post might be ignored but Alhamdulillah its not. May Allah make life so much easy for you and may you get what you want with khair. Ameeen

One thing that made me happy and sad too at a time. I feel like Alhamdulillah i have now in the phase of Lawamah(lamenting self) that means i am out of darkness a bit Alhamdulillah. But you said there is struggle between the Light that has entered in my heart and the evil that i have accumulated already by sins. It made me sad to think, light is very much less but darkness is too much. How will this little light suppress the darkness? The evil forces are much stronger than the good ones? Please if you could elaborate further if its not a burden on you please. Thanks
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#7 [Permalink] Posted on 16th May 2019 01:58
Abdur Rahman ibn Awf wrote:
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Thank you so much for the help may Allah give u its reward in abundance. Ameen.

But here is no masjid, near by. We in English community and there is Masjid but thats bit far by walk. The muslim sisters here are changed than Pakistani sisters they wont mix up with me. If they do they are not pious enough. Nor i have time for making friends. Is here sisters section? Or i may get contact of female scholar?
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#8 [Permalink] Posted on 16th May 2019 02:59
Muslimah S wrote:
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Yes there is a sister's section but for their protection we have a bit of strict policy to be added.

I'll get someone to PM you by tomorrow inshaAllah.
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#9 [Permalink] Posted on 16th May 2019 06:28
Muslimah S wrote:
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Keep making dua to Allah swt,it is Allah swt who gives enlightenment,it is Allah swt who takes us out of darkness to noor,it is Allah swt who gives taufeeq and accepts us unworthy slaves into his Rahma....

When Allah is with us,we are never alone. When Allah is on our side,we can never be defeated by darkness. When Allah accepts us,no one can reject us...

Have trust and faith.

Keep repeating the meaning of لا حول و لا قوة الا بالله in your mind when you are free. It means :” We can not achieve any good or avoid anything bad EXCEPT with the help of Allah”.Relax and surrender your worries to Allah,indeed Allah is the most merciful.

When we take one baby step towards Allah,HE comes many steps closer to us.When we walk towards him,HE comes running towards us...and when we are about to fall,HE holds us and raise us towards himself....
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#10 [Permalink] Posted on 16th May 2019 14:40
Muslimah S wrote:
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Jazak Allah for your duas. May Allah help us all in this journey of Sirat e Mustaqeem.

Please re read my reply. In it is the answer of how to fight this darkness.

I have already mentioned that keep on offering regular prayers, keep on doing dhikr and keep on avoiding the environment of sins and Insha Allah you will one day upgrade to Nafs e Mutmainnah.

Wassalam,
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#11 [Permalink] Posted on 17th May 2019 01:54
Yasin wrote:
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Ok i shall be waiting. Thanks
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#12 [Permalink] Posted on 17th May 2019 01:57
Thaank you soo much for getting my point and making it clear... JazakAllah Khair

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#13 [Permalink] Posted on 17th May 2019 01:58
ALIF wrote:
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Thaank you soo much for getting my point and making it clear... JazakAllah Khair
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#14 [Permalink] Posted on 17th May 2019 02:04
sipraomer wrote:
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Yes i have got that... you told me how to fight it.. but i was asking the evil in heart is 90% and the Light is just less.... How it will fight with more. But someone has said Allah will help me inshaAllah and i need to make duas. Sometimes i use to think will i conquer my Evil self. I have less good deeds. V v less in my eyes. Thats why i got worried but i am hopeful now Alhamdulillah
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#15 [Permalink] Posted on 17th May 2019 02:55
20
Never Lose Hope In ALLAH.


By: Khadija Mansaray

Source: maestrouzy.com/

There is a major barrier that’s blocking many Muslims from getting closer to Allah and improving their relationship with Him. This barrier is losing hope in the mercy of Allah. Sometimes people think that Allah will never forgive them because of the multitude of their sins. As a result, they slacken in performing their acts of worship and some even abandon them as they lose hope in attaining the mercy of Allah. However, Allah, The Exalted has said:

“Say, ‘O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful.’” (Surah Az-Zumar, Ayah 53)”

What we need to understand is that no one is perfect and part of being imperfect is falling into errors, including committing sins. Because committing sins is a part of our design, that is why Allah’s most emphasized attribute is His Mercy. It is a fact that mankind will commit sins. The Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said, “All humans are sinners and the best sinners are those who repent much.” (Recorded in Abu Dawood)

It should also be noted that there are several stories in the Qur’an and Hadith about people who committed dreadful crimes and were forgiven when they repented and sought forgiveness from Allah.

So, what we must do is recognize that Allah is the Most Merciful. We cannot abandon Allah due to our sins because no one is exempt from committing sins. At the same time, we shouldn’t use Allah’s Mercy as an excuse to commit sins. However, we should always have hope in the fact that no matter what we do, or how massive our sins are, Allah will always forgive them if we turn to Him sincerely in repentance and try our best to please Him. It is because of His mercy He made us to sin so that we can turn to Him for forgiveness and get closer to Him. Hence, we should never lose hope in attaining His mercy.

Remember to repent and seek forgiveness before it is too late as we do not know the time of our departure from this world.

The Prophet (SAW) said, “Allah the Almighty said:

“O son of Adam, so long as you call upon Me and ask from Me, I shall pardon you for what you have done, and I wouldn’t care. O son of Adam, were your sins to reach the clouds of the sky and were you then to ask forgiveness of Me, I would forgive you. O son of Adam, were you to come to Me with sins nearly as great as the earth and were you then to face Me, ascribing no partner to Me, I would bring you forgiveness almost as great as it.’” (Tirmidhi)”
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