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abu mohammed, sweetmuslimahk1, Taalibah
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#31 [Permalink] Posted on 4th March 2014 13:33
When a man opens the car door for his wife, you can be sure of one thing, either the car is new or the wife is.
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#32 [Permalink] Posted on 4th March 2014 14:08
The cops, while investigating a theft in a readymade garments store, caught the thief and were interrogating him. They asked the thief why did he steal in the same store 4 times.

Bob the thief confessed that the first time he stole an expensive gown, he gifted it to his wife. He added, "You know how women are! I had to go back three times to change it!"
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#33 [Permalink] Posted on 4th March 2014 14:12

Boy: checking out girl
friend: duuuuude lower your gaze, it's haram!!
Boy: Chill bro, I'm still on my first look
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#34 [Permalink] Posted on 4th March 2014 14:13


I lost my nephew at the airport, but I can't yell out his name for him to hear me, because his name is jihad. #MuslimProblems
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#35 [Permalink] Posted on 4th March 2014 14:32
the fake shaykh wrote:
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Yep, the thread is based on the entire book plus one other book I have.
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#36 [Permalink] Posted on 4th March 2014 16:06
abu mohammed wrote:
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I brought this book many years ago, finally I thought it'll come to some use ..... Never mind
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#37 [Permalink] Posted on 4th March 2014 17:40
I recall this story, the scholar mentioned was either Imam Abu Hanifah or Imam Ja'far As-sadiiq (2 versions but same story)


A man stole 2 fruits and 2 breads then gave it to the poor. Then he came to challenge a scholar :


Man : "do you know Sheikh, I just stole a food, then giving it to a poor as a charity. Allah had said in Qur'an, "whoever brings a good deed, he shall have 10 like it, and whoever brings an evil deed he shall be recompensed only with the like of it.

"So, on this basis, I have stolen 2 breads and 2 fruits. Hence I have 4 sins in my account. But I have given it in a charity, so I have earned 4 x 10 = 40 good deeds. Since 40 - 4 = 36, I still have 36 good deeds in my account. What a pity you have no knowledge on such calculations!"

Scholar : "but have you not heard other Qur'an verse saying "Allah only accept charity from what is good"?

"So you have 4 sins from stealing those items and 4 more sins for giving them to someone else without the permission of the owners. And another 1 sin for proudly annoucing your sin. So you have collected 9 sins but not a single good deeds! With such "calculations" not just you mislead yourself but you harm others as well!"

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#38 [Permalink] Posted on 4th March 2014 17:50
Robber (handcuffed; speaking furiously to his assistant): Who told you to share our bank robbery plan on facebook?
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