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Diapered U.S. Soldiers

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#1 [Permalink] Posted on 24th January 2012 16:22
By Hanif Hammad

Safar 27, 1433 A.H, Sunday, January 22, 2012

In the Name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.

There have been startling reports in the different blogs and websites and media release circulating around "diaper scarcity" or "the US-NATO troops in diapers" over the past couple of weeks.

Few days ago, I came upon an amusingly newsworthy report under the title "diapered soldier" or so that I'd kind of like to share with you.

According to the newspaper reports, the US authorities have quietly and unofficially requested the Pakistani authorities for the immediate provision of the tissue paper and pampers in the recent times.

A diplomatic source and press release said that the highly-secured and well-equipped US-NATO troops can not venture out of the heavily-protected armored personnel carriers to relieve themselves for the fear of facing Mujahideen, as a result, the only option the US-NATO troops are left with is to have on pampers so that they ease themselves comfortably while confronting Taliban.

To put it simply, the latter choice for the US-NATO in case of lack of diapers while fighting Taliban would be quite an embarrassing and humiliating one. Can you imagine what it would be?" p***ing their paints during the fight."!!!

I'll let you into a little secret though; some press release has even revealed that the US-NATO forces uncontrollably pee in their pants during the fight with Mujahideen, or for the fear of attack by Taliban.

Mind you, I, for one, guess it is a fairly good idea for the US-NATO forces to wear diapers without any fear of soiling their uniforms.

So 'Let us not stand between a US soldier and his diaper, as the news reports put it.

Ansar Abbasi, an eminent writer and editor for one of the newspapers from Pakistan, The News International has surfaced interesting facts by issuing a funny column" Pamper (Diaper) Army (US)."

He said the spokesman of ISAf in Afghanistan was contacted regarding this issue who argued that he was neither a soldier nor did he know that the US Marines and NATO soldiers wear diapers while fighting their war against Taliban inside Afghanistan.

Ansar Abbasi further said in his article that US Embassy spokesman Mark Stroh sent through a mobile SMS, what he called, a "denial" of the reality and The News story (a brazen denial by Mark Stroh), adding that besides him the Isaf Deputy PAO Col Gary Kolb could also be cited to have said this.

Since the emergence of the issue of " diaper crisis faced by US-NATO forces on the ground and its resulting consequences" the Pakistani authorities have refused to allow the provision of the US-NATO supplies on an urgent basis.

However, it is believed that the Pakistan government has been advised to retrieve a large supply of diapers from the Nato containers and urgently send them to the US forces in Afghanistan which, on the one hand, would be of a humanitarian assistance; on the other hand, would clear the Pakistan government further of charges and involvement in the issue. Further delay in supplies by Pakistani authorities and failure to comply with the US demands may lead to the emergence of a far more fatally toxic stench in Afghanistan than that of phosphorus and uranium bombs previously exercised by US which would turn the sweet-smelling aroma of flowers and roses of the upcoming spring into the smell of death and mourning!

To tell you the truth, the current Afghan War in connection with the very heated issue opened up a whole new chapter in the global history from the combative aspect as there used to be weaponry such as sword, shield, javelin which developed into gun, artillery. rocket, armored tank, fighter craft, pilotless plane in the modern sense of the word and so forth, while " a US soldier wearing a military nappy" is the most up-to-the-minute term the we have recently come across for the first time in the world history and his" diaper" is an unusually extraordinary weapon and armor, isn't it?

It is the destiny of a country with the most modern industry and state-of-the-art technology worldwide, strange as it may seem.

It reminds me of a well-know Arabic quotation" السیف بالساعد لا الساعد بالسیف" which, figuratively speaking, indicates that it is the hand that uses the sword, not the sword that uses the hand ,that is, the actual power behind the sword is that of a powerful hand, or the sword is of no use without a stronger hand which leads us to the conclusion that you have to be man enough to use your weapon in the battle field or will certainly need to use a diaper to help support the weapon and avoid the side effect.

It is a proven fact that when the faith goes out of some one and belief, courage, and spirit desert their hearts, the worldly arms and logistic support would never do them any good. On the other way round, anyone equipped with power of true faith and spirit of Jihad will single handedly have the entire army taste embarrassing defeat and humiliation no matter how arrogant and exploitive it may be.

The likelihood is that the America and her allies, by now, may have realized the fact their pipe-dream would no longer come true in Afghanistan; they had better leave our country or they are sure to ask Pakistan for the their soldiers' coffins, too, along with the toilet papers and diapers.


The Islamic Emirate of Afghanistan

http://theunjustmedia.com/Afghanistan/Statements/Jan12/Diapered%20U.S.%20soldiers.htm

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#2 [Permalink] Posted on 24th January 2012 17:00
I've got plenty of Pampers wipes left from.when the kids were in their diapers.

I can't donate them, and what will the Mujahideen do with them.

Actually, can you imagine the look on the fearsome Mujahids face when he goes to get his booty and his remarks. "What, no ammo, adult diapers, is this what the kuffar have to fight the Soldiers of Allah"

Lol to.the above Seifeddine, Jazakallah. Made my day. (not feeling too good today)

Although I understand that this is just speculation, I'm just continuing with the laughter.
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#3 [Permalink] Posted on 24th January 2012 17:15
Reminds me of a comment by Maulana Masud Azhar Sahib. He said in a talk, something like:

"The Americans claim they are victorious, and here is the scenario....

Hamid Karzai: Officer, I need the bathroom.

American officer: Mr President, it is not safe to use the toilets.

Hamid Karzai: So what do I do?

American officer: Mr president, its safer to do it in your pants."

Is this what the kuffar call "Victory". Well 10 years+ and it is still the same.

Victory!
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#4 [Permalink] Posted on 24th January 2012 18:52
Quote:
To tell you the truth, the current Afghan War in connection with the very heated issue opened up a whole new chapter in the global history from the combative aspect as there used to be weaponry such as sword, shield, javelin which developed into gun, artillery. rocket, armored tank, fighter craft, pilotless plane in the modern sense of the word and so forth, while " a US soldier wearing a military nappy" is the most up-to-the-minute term the we have recently come across for the first time in the world history and his" diaper" is an unusually extraordinary weapon and armor, isn't it?


Good one this, we could play a game here. Let's name these nappies.

1. Smart Pants.
2. Big Dipper
3. Stink bomb
4. WMD. Wet My Diapers.
5. Bullet proof toilet.
6. Huggies LOL.
7. Anti Taliban pants.
8. The only pants for a longer life.
9. Life Jacket.
10. The crap pants.

Pilot less plane and now the toilet less soldier.
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#5 [Permalink] Posted on 24th January 2012 19:46
Lol@3 and 4

So when a soldier shouts to his troop 'RELOADING', so he can get cover fire, would they now shout 'UNLOADING'?
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#6 [Permalink] Posted on 24th January 2012 20:15
11. Sniper in a diaper.

(message to the army personel, "Our sniper was attacked and caught with his pants down, to avoid such humiliation we introduce the snipers diaper. This is to be kept secret, we shall call it "Project Lav")
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#7 [Permalink] Posted on 24th January 2012 20:22
12. Thuggies. Nappies for for thugs.
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#8 [Permalink] Posted on 24th January 2012 20:34
Feeling sick today.and stayed in.bed all day, hence the replies and thoughts.

Everyone seen the T-shirt?

13. IPood.
14. Downloading.
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#9 [Permalink] Posted on 25th January 2012 05:35
Yasin wrote:
Lol@3 and 4

So when a soldier shouts to his troop 'RELOADING', so he can get cover fire, would they now shout 'UNLOADING'?


Too funny!

Project Lav!
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#10 [Permalink] Posted on 8th January 2015 16:23
Manila traffic enforcers to wear diapers during pope’s visit

The Associated Press, Manila
Wednesday, 7 January 2015

When Pope Francis visits the Philippines next week, traffic enforcers won't let the capital's streets get gridlocked if they have to answer the call of nature.

About 2,000 traffic enforcers who will be on duty during the Jan. 15-19 papal visit will be required to wear adult diapers, said Metropolitan Manila Development Authority chairman Francis Tolentino.

Tolentino also encouraged people who will wait for hours to see the pope to also wear diapers.

The prospect of wearing diapers while on duty was "well received" by his men, he said Wednesday.

Tolentino said the idea will be tested on Friday by 800 traffic enforcers who work shifts during the nearly 24-hour annual procession of the Black Nazarene. It will be the first time that traffic enforcers in the Philippines will wear diapers while on duty in the streets, he said.

The Black Nazarene procession attracts hundreds of thousands of barefoot mostly-male Filipino Roman Catholics who parade a centuries-old black statue of Jesus Christ which devotees believe possess mystical powers that could cure ailments and answer wishes of good health and fortune.

Tolentino says there won't be enough portable toilets for the millions of people expected to see Pope Francis hold an open-air Mass at the seaside Rizal Park on Jan. 18.

"If you attend an event that will last for 24 hours, you cannot go around looking for a (portable toilet)," Tolentino said.

Priests, nuns, seminarians, and the elderly also should consider wearing diapers, he said.

Asked if he will also wear one, Tolentino said, "I will try, but in my case, I have less hydration."
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#11 [Permalink] Posted on 8th January 2015 17:09
abu mohammed wrote:
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LOL!!
What Mol Yasin said seems to become absolutely necessary now, there should be a lol button.... lol
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